The Ballad of Lacie O’Malley
On the subject of spiders and sexual pleasure.

This poem is very silly, but just a warning for sexual content and arachnophobia. Originally written 2017.
Here I’ll tell you the tale of a woman named Lacie,
Though now I shall warn you: the tale will be racy,
Abandon hope, all ye who enter here,
And who enter young Lacie
With nothing to fear.